Yesterday I went to the hairdresser on my own! 😀 You may be thinking ‘so what?’, but this was a huge step for me. I haven’t been on my own to get my hair cut in over 12yrs. This was something that began when I was ill with chemical sensitivity and requiring close to full time care. I trust my hairdresser, and that’s a story in itself, and he was non-judgemental when I began to tear up. He didn’t ask why I was crying and I was grateful as that answer was multi-layered. I recognised that I still have grief for what was and noticed that I began to berate myself for feeling that. I told myself that was nonsense, accept it and send it up with gratitude, which is exactly what I did. The fact that I’m here sharing this with you all tells me that I’m letting go of the need for shame.
The trip to the hairdresser has been on my mind today. My dear Dad commented that he couldn’t tell the difference when he saw me. I hesitated before replying because I was wanting to know how I felt about that. It’s common for women to acknowledge hair cuts and compliment, whether we like what we see or not. Dad was being honest and did I care? no. There was also the possibility that he was trying to elicit a response. Did he get it? no.
Hair is about personal power. I have long gone through extremes with my hair length, cutting it to a about 1/2-1inch all over, which was lovely to manage. I used to get paranoid that I looked like a male and would grow it again. As a child, I frequently had people tell me how much I looked like my brother, that’s where that fear of looking like a boy comes from. Pulling it out now.
I would allow my hair to grow over the following 2 years and then begin the process again. Interesting that I chose 2 yrs. I would have told you back then that was the time required for me to grow my hair out and to a point where I became tired of it. Two is about physical/spiritual duality and that’s exactly what I was oscillating between, using my hair to express the need for balance.
Due to my long illness and Self healing, my hair took a while to reflect my change in health. Yesterday my hairdresser commented that my hair should be healthier than it is, but I’m aware of the mental/emotional/physical abuse I put myself through last year. Last year was literally about coping and staying present and I’m coming out of that now like a canon ball blasting it’s way from its confines. I know I’ll be seeing physical improvement in my hair this year.
I’ve begun using Rosemary and Ylang Ylang essential oils in my hair treatment as this promotes health and growth. My hairdresser loves the scent and enjoys using my products whenever I go there. He knows I won’t allow anyone to put chemicals on me! There are many other oils that can be used for hair, depending upon what you want, let me know if you’d like more information.
The fact that I’m taking greater care of my hair tells me I’m taking greater care of myself and my personal power.
How do you feel when you change your hair and no one notices?
Do you consider your hair to be anything other than what adorns your head?
How often do you change your hairstyle?
Maybe you don’t have hair. What does it mean to be bald?
What does personal power mean to you?
How often do you change your look?
Have you put SHAME at your pineal in brown to see what’s revealed? I suggest you do that more than once over time.
Do you rely upon anyone for simple things that you could be doing yourself?